Reform your mind to think with confidence
Our goal in this article is to help you reform your mind to think with confidence. Our plan is to help you build motivation through a hands-on CBT process. Some of the CBT processes include breathing techniques that we can use to help you take control of your body and mind when symptoms of your social phobia develop. We will consider CBT methods to build your self-discipline. You will learn to build your confidence in your ability to take control of your life. You will also develop the motivation to help you maintain control and continue your progress of conquering your social phobia.
Breathing Exercise
Take a few moments to perform some breathing exercises. You will then use the when you feel that you are losing control of your thoughts or actions.
To get started, close your eyes and focus on your breathing patterns. Notice your responses as you inhale and exhale. Take some long, deep breaths and hold each breath for a few seconds before you exhale. Notice the relief you feel afterwards.
You may feel some tension when your breathing exercises start. Instead of fighting the tension, work with it by allowing it to occur and then relax your muscles. Do some stretching exercises daily with your breathing exercises to get more from your therapy. Practice your stretching and breathing exercises daily until you start to adapt to muscle relaxation. With each effort you put forth, you will feel more relief from your tension.
Self-Talk Routine
Each day, use self-talk to persuade yourself that you have the ability to control your negative thinking. Each time your negative thoughts develop, counteract them with some positive affirmations just like we used in previous lessons. For example, when you think, “I can’t do this”, affirm to yourself that you can.
One of the common problems people must challenge is their will to compare their abilities and self to other people. Don’t fall into this trap as it only leads you back to social phobia. Instead of comparing yourself to others, start looking at your strengths and abilities in a positive light. Practice this procedure every day until you master your negative thinking.
Each day, visualize yourself taking action to master your social phobia. Each time you overcome some of the negative thinking, give yourself a reward. Rewarding yourself should become an incentive for you to continue progressing in your treatment therapy.
Affirming that you can socialize
Now it is time to prove to yourself that you have the power within you to socialize with other people. Start with an affirmative: “I am in control of me”. Review your progress. Take notes of any mistakes you made and try to find solutions to resolve those mistakes to avoid making them again. State – “I am a human being who makes mistakes too, but I am always willing to change my ways to improve my abilities”.
When you can make such affirmatives, you prove to yourself that you are responsible for who you are and what you do. You have recognized that you are a human being. Next, state, “I am in control of me”. Reward yourself each time you make progress. State, “I have the ability to master anything I want”. Develop some useful skills to help you take control of your life and master your social anxiety.
Problem-solving techniques
In this area, we will consider some creative problem-solving techniques that you can use to overcome your social phobia.
The key to solving problems is to feel your problems and understand them. When problems emerge, recognize them. Look at your strengths and weaknesses to find ways to improve. Discover some concerns by exploring them and take time to find ways to resolve your concerns.
Consider
What can you do to improve your life? What troubles you the most? Which behaviors are causing you to fear socializing?
Now we will discover the answers to the three questions above by searching for the truth.
Identify Your Qualities
During this process, you will learn to identify your qualities. You will also be moved to consider the truth and facets of your anxiety. Consider some questions:
When you ask yourself these questions consider your feelings and thoughts. Observe your reactions. Write down some options to help you gain control. Scrutinize your findings. Examine each element of your discovery, especially the truth. Look at the situation from all angles.
Reaffirm your problems
Next, reaffirm your problems to find answers that best describe your circumstances. In other words, ask yourself the same questions as you did above. Now you will be asked to explore the problem. Generate some new ideas to help you find solutions to solving your problems. Discover which solutions are best to help you conquer your social phobia. Ask yourself: how can I improve my thinking and behaviors to help me overcome my fears?
The key to finding new ideas is called brainstorming. When you come up with new ideas, it is a breakthrough in your recovery plan. Some people’s minds ramble on aimlessly between thoughts; this makes it difficult for them to organize their thoughts. Find the best possible solution to help you manage your thoughts effectively. For example, when your mind feels cluttered, do your breathing exercise to help you gain control of your thoughts.
Let’s say you fear rejection. Rejections, of course, are a negative response that would make anyone feel uneasy. Rejection is unavoidable because people have their own set of beliefs, ideas, opinions, etc.; thus, we can’t please everyone all of the time, but we can please those who find us interesting. The best way to conquer the fear of rejection is facing it head on.
Every day, practice your affirmations. State, “rejection is a state of mind that I have control of, since I can choose who I interact with”.
People spend their lifetime trying to avoid reality. The fact is not everyone will like you. That is OK; not everyone likes me, either, but I do have excellent friends who think the world of me. So I know that I am a good person; it is just that everyone shares the same commonalities or beliefs, so they are never going to agree with us.
Use Your Good Ideas
Review your new ideas. Extract from that list you have created up to seven ideas that seem most fitting to help you master your phobia. Eliminate the bad ideas and take the good ideas to the bank and cash in your money. Look at your alternatives closely to find which ones are best suited to help you master the problems that take over your life.
Move to accept what you find. Ask some questions to help you develop your ideas to create a plan that you can use to meet your goals. For example, you may ask: what are my beliefs? Who shares those beliefs with me? What type of person am I? Be honest with yourself without thinking negatively.
Practice what you learn daily. Don’t put off your plans to master your social phobia. Most people who suffer from social phobia tend to believe that they are not worth fighting for. You are worth the fight, but it takes you to see this and to make room for positive changes.
Speaking of changes – people often fear changes because it produces unforeseen results. Change is good and the more effort you apply to making positive changes the more unforeseen good will befall you. Take care to reward yourself each time you make some progress. Don’t let others discourage you. If you let them, some people will drag you into the mud because they like misery. They are miserable so they want you to wallow in that misery with them to share the experience. Thus, look for friends that will build you up and not tear you down.
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